It's A Dog's Life

It's been almost 20 years since Diamond died and I still remember how empty the house felt during those early days after we'd had him euthanised.  Each time I'd walk in the front door, his absence was like a body blow.  I'd step from the foyer into the living room and not know what I was supposed to do next.

The silence that washed over me was debilitating. How was I supposed to get through this?

When I'd take walks in the neighborhood, I felt off balance without that leash folded into my palm.  Where was that solid, black body occasionally bumping my hip, but otherwise heeling so nicely alongside me?  I felt odd, out-of-sorts, incomplete. 

As I look back today on the eight years that we had Diamond, I can connect the dots between each stage of his growth with some comparable growth stage of mine.

I was working for a national recruiting company doing inside sales support when Diamond came home at nine weeks old.  During the year that followed, I'd resign from that position to start substitute teaching.  Shortly after that, I'd matriculate into a graduate program to earn my Master's degree.

When I started taking graduate courses, I was newly married.  Two-three years later, I became a mom.  My husband and I would sell our first home in the city to buy my grandparents' house in the village of Fairport situated along the Erie canal.  It was a far cry from the ocean communities that I'd summered in along the New Jersey shore, but, it was a body of water - and, that was better than nothing.

There were a lot of "firsts" in those early years.  First home, first or second "real job", first dog, getting married, having a baby.  We didn't have a longterm vision of where we wanted to end up after 50 years.  We were too wrapped up in the day-to-day stuff. 

Long term vision?  I was totally clueless. 

Perhaps, the best analogy for me at that time, was that I was following along in Diamond's footsteps. Living in the present moment so completely, that it never occurred to me to create a larger life plan.

There is value in living in the present, always assuming you know how to ask for what you want.

Diamond was awfully good at asking for what he wanted.

That first time he asked, he was seven weeks old.  His eyes met mine as he calmly sat at the back of the wriggling pile of his littermates.  He was asking to be picked.  "Take me home."  And, I knew it.

The life lesson here?  Don't ever be afraid to ask for what you want because the likelihood is that you'll get it.

The "secret" is that once you've got it, protect it.  Diamond did that.  Many times, his physical size alone was enough to get his point across when he was asking for something.  Like, don't come into this house.

When we lived in the city, the gas and electric company had house keys to all of the homes in our neighborhood.  This meant that the meter readers could get into houses when the owners were away to read the meters.  I found this out one afternoon when I pulled into my driveway and the meter reader crossed the street to speak with me.

"Hey, lady!  I had the back door to your house open and was about to walk in, when this big black dog appeared at the top of the stairs."

The guy backed out of the house pretty quickly when he heard this dog start to growl and bark.

Diamond wasn't even two years old when this happened.  I'd wondered when he'd mature enough to want to protect what he considered to be sacred and under his care.  Apparently, he had.

As I stood looking at this guy, trying to figure out what to reply, he went on to tell me that he fully intended to go back into my house to read my meter.  "What," I answered carefully, "made you think that you'd be able to get out safely, if in fact, you'd gotten inside?"

That was my cue to call the gas company to let them know that I couldn't be responsible for what my dog did if one of their employees insisted on entering my home when I wasn't there to supervise.  

Ask. How incredibly simple yet powerful a concept. 

Comments

[Barbara]

You nailed it - our growth intertwines with theirs, and quite often they're the ones leading and teaching us.

[Kathy]

Seems I've struck a chord with you. Am so happy you're finding worth in my posts. This went through a LOT of rough drafts before I posted it here.

[TechnoBabe]

I really like the picture of Diamond sitting at the back of the pack looking at you and the two of you connecting. That is a wonderful remembrance. I had never heard of a utility company having access to homes.

[Jillsy]

I had a cat for 16 years and at the time I couldn't imagine getting closer to an animal. But, then came along our Simon, a Yorkie, and I found out I was completely wrong. He grabbed hold of my husband's and my hearts so hard in the first days it was amazing. We can't even imagine him not being around, but we know that day is, unfortunately, inevitable. I think you described that feeling very well in this post. And yes, we do learn a lot from them. I now understand the term "Man's best friend".

And, I too, can't imagine a utility company having keys to houses!!

I am here through Barbara at Long Hollow!

[Kathy]

Thank you both for taking the time to comment. Diamond really taught me how to honor "that look" that an animal gives you when he (or she) is saying "pick me"; every dog we brought home after Diamond chose us. All we had to remember was to watch carefully...And, yep. Finding out that a guy had carte blanche to come into my home was a bit unnerving to say the least!